New York Renovator

We went on a two-day trip and left our half-Siamese baby, Livvy, alone in the house. Well– we also left the two Yorkshire terriers and the cockatiel, too, but they are mere pets. They are also contained (the dogs in a large penned area and the bird in a cage), so Livvy has the rule of the roost while we’re gone.

I have several “pet cams” set up around the house to keep an eye on the critters whenever we are out of town. Previously, we’ve always taken Livvy with us when we travel but this time we decided to leave her home to watch over everything. The surveillance camera monitored all the activity in the house, and we were able to get a good idea of what exactly Livvy does while we’re away.

The first thing she did was hop in my desk chair and snooze. She always sleeps in my desk chair when I’m away.

After a few hours, she realizes that we aren’t back yet. She waits for our return.

Nobody comes in. Hm. She saunters over to the Yorkies. She seems very pleased when they go bananas in their typical Yorky way. They bark, they spin in circles, they crash into each other and trip over the food. I can’t see her on the camera, but I just KNOW she is snickering at them.

We left her PLENTY of food, but she does like her meals “fresh.” She she tips over the cat food bag for a quick bite.

Hm. Nobody comes running to sweep it up.

WHAT IS TAKING THE FAMILY SO LONG?!

She inspects the camera.

“I’m going insane!!! It’s booooring around here! Don’t leave me alone with these nutty dogs!!!”

Unrecorded on any camera, Livvy wanders upstairs. She ferociously gnaws on the white cords to my window miniblinds. How do I know? I come home to find the blinds all mangled and chewed beyond repair. It was her only bad deed but FOR PETE’S SAKE she’s eaten through seven miniblind sets since the summer!!!!

FINALLY we arrive home, and she’s all happy and love-y again. Happy Face.

Something very strange has happened. I realized it the other night while I outside in the backyard during twilight. The entire yard and forest and small creek that runs next door is completely silent. Completely silent!

No crickets. No spring peepers. Nothing. I have never experienced anything like it since I’ve lived here. Besides the mosquitoes quietly whirring around us, the only forest activity was the lightning bugs, blinking their lights in utter silence.

This is my backyard. Behind that scraggly brush is a small rivulet that fills with peepers every spring. There’s no sign of my beloved musical friends there this year.

At dusk, the area is usually ablaze with sounds. The crickets usually chirp so loudly that they challenge the sounds of the busy streets. And the peepers– those tiny little frogs that exhale high-pitched raspy whistles– are gone. Everything is SILENT.

I found a video recording of peepers in the northeast. This is what my neighborhood SHOULD be sounding like:

I’m devastated!! What happened?! I have lived here for over 14 years and nothing like this has ever happened. Was it the awful April flooding that swept my critters away? Is it some kind of pesticide or toxic chemical that has been sprayed in the forest and has descended into my neighborhood? Is there some evil raccoon gang or other monstrous creatures that have eaten all my precious nightly musicians in some kind of perverse thuggery??

This spring and summer has been weird, simply weird. I feel forlorn, bereft of a very necessary ecological foundation. It just ain’t summertime without the peepers.

…not a very good combination.

Do you hear that tinkling sound, the sounds of shards of glass falling to the cold, concrete floor? That’s my heart, busted into little bitty pieces. A beautiful barn owl died in my chimney’s water tank duct last week.

It started late in the evening. I was upstairs, and the kids were eating dinner downstairs. Suddenly, a huge crash was heard in the first floor, or in the basement. The kids called me down to investigate.

We figured the sound was coming from the basement. This has been ONE heck of a winter, I tell ya. Deer eating everything, possums and raccoons are squirrels nesting in the house walls, the basement… ice dams the size of Goliath dripping down into the garage and inside the walls… *sigh* It’s not a happy year for home ownership.

So I expected the intruder to be a squirrel. We have a lot of squirrels, and they all seem determined to make my life as miserable as possible. They nest in the walls, loudly scratching and squeaking all night…

I had no idea if this squirrel was rabid. I was a little afraid of the what-ever-it-is in the ducting.

I took a stick and banged on the duct. The thing squirmed and scratched. We wondered if it was a bird or a squirrel. It scratched like a squirrel, but it wasn’t as rough. Those of you lucky folks who have had squirrels nesting in the walls, you know what I mean when I say “sounds like a squirrel.” They have this unmistakable (read: ANNOYING) sound. But if it was a bird, why didn’t it fly back up through the chimney?And it was 10pm, what bird in its right mind would be flapping around the roof this late??

OK, I admit, NO, we DON’T have a chimney cap. Oh I know we should. The previous owners did us the honor of fixing the chimney (complete with lightning rod, the old pastor who lived her was deathly afraid if lightning), but never installed a cap, and never lined the chimney. So it’s a wide-open gaping hole for nasty squirrels and their riffraff.We haven’t had any problems with the chimney (that I know of) until now.

Anyway, the thing wouldn’t come out. I rapped on the duct a few times, but couldn’t drive the critter out. I tried to lift the ducting just a little, and when I did, I felt something furry at the end. EEK!!! I was now too terrified of lifting the ducting and having a live squirrel jumping out at me. I did what any respectable wife would do in such a circumstance: I’d wait for the husband to get home.

By the time he got home from work, it was very late and he was exhausted. I supposed the critter would have to wait until morning. Hopefully, he’d come out by then. The critter. Oh, and the husband, yeah.

Well, we went down next day, and I rapped on the pipe, hoping the scratching would cease. No scratching! The critter must have escaped! But the pipe made a dull *thud*. Oh no. It’s probably dead. Ugh. The Hubs geared up in his special superduperheavtyduty latex gloves (squirrels have sharp teeth, you know), and he lifted the ducting.

I thought it was a squirrel.

He pulled it out and we both stared for a minute. I didn’t see the little squirrely ears. What happened to its head?!??!!?

Then it hit me. It’s a bird. Oh, Lord. I thought maybe it was an osprey, as we have some around here. The Hubs exclaimed, “It’s an owl!”

I almost cried. That poor, poor owl. A squirrel would have deserved such a fate, but an owl?! Owls are good, gentle creatures. They don’t bare their sharp little teeth and maniacally chatter at me from the trees. Owls don’t steal the bird seed that I leave for the cardinals. That poor, poor owl! I was crushed. I regretted rapping on the duct. Maybe I killed him!! But then, maybe the fumes from the hot water tank overcame him.Wah!!!

So, a poor owl is dead. Wah. And we have to cap our chimney, pronto.

It will be a busy spring for me. The ice dams in the house are causing terrible leaks. We may need to repair the roof and do some interior repair work. What a winter. I can’t wait til it’s over!

I wondered what Livvy was staring at so intently on the front porch this evening. She often sits in the front entry, staring at the outside world of the two outside cats, Milo and Fuzzy. But she was staring a little more… intently… so I peeked out.

WHOA.

He arched his back when he saw me approach.

Little menace. I hollered and stomped my feet, and both raccoon and cat took off.

My daughter says we should Shoot Him, Skin Him, and Make Him Into a Hat. Maybe one of those groovy coon-skin personalized baseball bats, perhaps?? LOL, wow did that one work out well! LOLOL.

We do NOT want raccoons hanging around the house. There have been reports of coons with rabies in the area. *sigh* Another thing to deal with.

They’re back.

Mama Deer brings her newborn babies to our gardens every year. *sigh* Deer are very cute, but they are eating machines on legs. They decimated my Rose of Sharon, Apple trees, Willow trees, well just about everything (!) a year ago. Their appetite is insatiable. An hour of no eating is like a day of austin weight loss for these non-stop-eating critters!

The Mama and other baby are skittish (but they still came near somewhat). One of the fawns is bold. He waltzed right over and licked our hands, munched from my tree, and found my son’s leftover luncheon crumbs on his pants. I managed to catch a brief video.

They ARE cute, but don’t be fooled for a second: they’ll eat you out of house and home in a DAY.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I hate deer! I hate them with a burning white hot fiery inferno of liquid lava-boiling anger!

YEAH, the nasty critters ate their winter through my trees and flower gardens again this year!!

They ate my baby Weeping Willow tree down to a stub. I nurtured that thing for TWO years, and it’s gone. They’ve eaten my Rose of Sharon, my hostas, my baby Redbuds… they also ate through some of my brand-new spirea shrubs, and I also just found out that they’ve been imbibing on my beloved grapevine!! Look at this!!!!!

I don’t know what to do, I really don’t. I’ve tried leaving hair from the kids’ haircuts; bars of soap, cat litter, dried blood…. nothing has worked and THEY EAT EVERYTHING!

*sobs*

Besides maintaining a standing army with rifles, I don’t know what to do. Maybe I could get some motion detector lights that will shine bright lights when they sense motion? No, I’d need electric wiring for that. I think I may have to go high-tech with some deer fencing or deer repellant. Has anyone has any success with this?

Buy.com is having a great sale on the stuff right now. Buy.com is my new favorite store right now. I can’t believe all the stuff they have. It’s great, because they allow other, smaller stores to sell stuff, too, which increases the inventory and really makes it convenient to shop. I got hooked on them after seeing their Weekly Sale page online. The home and outdoor selection is great! I spotted this owl (no pun intended), too. I’ve been wanting to get one, to scare off the mice and the crows. My neighbors all have these owls on their fence posts; and so the critters have taken up residence at MY place because MY gardens seem to be the safe place for the drive-thru!

Check out Buy.com for loads of stuff– everyday living stuff, housewares, patio and outdoor stuff, summer apparel, loads and loads more! And don’t forget to bookmark the Weekly Sale page. If ONLY they came with deer-removal services, they’d be perfect! The repellant will have to do…